Wednesday, April 27, 2011

The Cause of Maturity

As I enter another of my usually temporary bursts of maturity, I feel a little more confident that this one will last. Because I believe I have finally determined the true cause of lasting maturity. It is not based in soul-searching reflection. Nor is it based in ambition, or determination. No, it is based in having to pay the electricity bill.

Things that Mature Adults do:

  • Take showers that are not half an hour long. Or an hour long.
  • Turn lights off when they leave a room, rather than, say, leave for the day with the lights on in their dorm room as was previously their habit.
  • Rely on natural light when possible, rather than sit in front of a window at noon with every light in the room turned on for no apparent reason.
  • Not turn on every single light in the house at night because they heard a creak and now are completely and utterly convinced that there is an axe-murderer or a clown SOMEWHERE.
  • Cook efficiently, instead of one thing at a time.
  • Wear socks instead of raising the heat unnecessarily.
  • Open windows instead of turning on the air conditioner unnecessarily.
  • Go to bed early instead of staying up till 4 am with the lights on.
  • Get up early instead of wasting hours of daylight.

Things that will reduce my electricity bill:

  • Taking showers that are not half an hour long. Or an hour long.
  • Turning lights off when I leave a room, rather than, say, leaving for the day with the lights on in my dorm room as was previously my habit.
  • Relying on natural light when possible, rather than sitting in front of a window at noon with every light in the room turned on for no apparent reason.
  • Not turning on every single light in the house at night because I heard a creak and now am completely and utterly convinced that there is an axe-murderer or a clown SOMEWHERE.
  • Cooking efficiently, instead of one thing at a time.
  • Wearing socks instead of raising the heat unnecessarily.
  • Opening windows instead of turning on the air conditioner unnecessarily.
  • Going to bed early instead of staying up till 4 am with the lights on.
  • Getting up early instead of wasting hours of daylight.

So now, I'm going to start acting like an ADULT. In one respect, anyway. I think if I were magically to morph fully into an adult in one setting my brain would short-circuit, and I would probably die. Baby steps.

3 comments:

  1. Hahaha aw, our No-No's growing up!!! That's so wonderful! It's so cute, you guys all getting apartments and houses... I have no idea why that's cute to me, but it is. MISS YOU!!!

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  2. I haven't even thought about this. I feel enlightened. And now entirely terrified of utility bills. Thanks.

    And you can't let your brain short circuit until I take my electrical engineering class in the fall. Then I can put it back together again. But not until then.

    P.S. If you come visit more often, you can rack up our electric bill instead of your own. <3

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  3. Hahaha! =D How is your apartment dear? I hope things are going as smashingly as you imagined they would. It sounds like you're learning lots! ;) How are things so far?

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